Someday is Today

It's a Monday. That means I should be at work or at school...somewhere. My body and mind are programmed that Mondays are days we get stuff done. This is the first Monday in awhile that I have not had to drive to OSU and sit through lecture, pour over body systems committing them to memory, or even get ready for work!  Today I have spent home with Isaiah. We have read books, worked on shapes and letters, played outside, and even had a delicious lunch of grilled cheese and chicken noodle soup. We organized all his dresser drawers, and made a bag of too-small stuff for Good Will. I would like to say that it has been nice, and I hope that it will be in the future, but this dang cold I have is lingering. Stuffed, painful sinuses, leading to huge headaches, watery eyes, constant sneezing and a runny nose. I feel lovely. I think I only managed to snap at Zay once, when he decided to pour marbles all over the living room floor, which our puppy eyed greedily. I was hoping to make it through these days being the mom extraordinaire. What I really want today is to lay in bed, close my eyes, and have someone else take care of me. I am not usually a big baby when I get sick, but this cold has me in its grasp, and I am ready to to waive my white flag and signal a surrender. "Come get me," I want to say, "if it will make me feel better faster." It feels unfair to be sick when it is so incredibly lovely outside. I LOVE the fall (my favorite season), and I love the fact that it misted all morning and is now sunny with a brisk breeze. It's like a promise that winter is around the corner. I know, most Oregonians curse the rain and cold, but I love those times of year, probably more than the mild summers. I managed to begin re-organizing my stuff in the bedroom. It has been on my to-do list. Barrett put up two shoe hangers in my little shoe/scarf/sweater closet (the one under the stairs), and hung me a shelf next to the mirror above the dresser that I get ready at everyday. I went through my nail polish and make-up, and re-organized that stuff, making me a nice, tidy girly area. There is more on my list, like going through my drawers and closet that are each laden with clothes (hey, I'm a collector), and going through Matthew's stuff as well, but I feel somewhat accomplished for how I have felt. Thank God that my dad wants his little buddy to play with and is having Isaiah stay the night with them tonight after Matt's soccer practice, which means that tomorrow I can finally take it easy. If you have children, you will understand this sentiment, and that there was no point even trying while watching a four-year old. :)

I had an epiphany today in the shower (this is when I get my best thoughts!). My realization was that we try so hard to live good lives. We (as in most everyone) talk about the things we want to do, the goals we have, the places we'd like to see, and then we always tack on a killer word at the end of our dreams...someday. It goes like this. "I'd like to learn to cook better, someday." "I'd like to go to Rome, someday." "I'll have a better job, someday."  Someday has become a hope and dream annihilator. Because we tack it on, we inevitably prolong the somedays in our lives until there just isn't enough time. Someday will run out eventually. I am turning 31 in January. By most standards, I am still young, and (most days) healthy. Why in the world would I save the dreams I have for another time in my life? It also dawned on me that maybe the secret to living the life I've always wanted, a life full on spontaneity and adventure, of variety and fun-is planning for my dreams. Does this take the fun out? I think not. It goes like this. I want to cook more for my family, and have a meal plan for an entire month so that I don't have to think about what to make...so I started making one for next month and am almost done. I have to have a  ton of variety, so I made a general plan first: Mexican food on Mondays, crock-pot meals on Thursdays, and so on. 

Barrett and I talk about activities we want to do, but then end up relaxing at home a lot of the time. While we need that, we also need to schedule the things we would like to learn, do and explore together. Today I looked into cooking classes, ballroom dance lessons, and short hikes. Barrett bought trap yesterday, so that we can begin trap-shooting together (you know, the clay pigeon thingys?). My point is-there is usually nothing stopping us. We'd have spent that money on other things anyhow. Now, it is true that I can't book a trip to Rome tomorrow. That would be too expensive. But I can plan the trip to Disneyland we agreed to take next Summer. I can actually even plan the trip to Europe (that I am hoping will be after I complete an RN program, you know a nice gift to self!). It's fun, and it's been proven that planning a vacation  actually de-stresses us. The only thing I can't do is buy the trip yet. I guess what I'm saying, you have likely heard before. "Grab life by the horns," says Dodge. But I am reminding you, that maybe with proper planning, you can achieve the life you imagined you would have. I know I can't do it all today, but this month I plan to hike with my husband and maybe our kids. It is even on the calendar. I find that I am less likely to argue about doing something when the details are already set, and something as simple as putting it into my iPhone reminds me that 2 days from now I am going somewhere. I plan to set up some sort of a class to take together, cooking or dance, and to let my guy teach me how to shoot at things in the air (after-all as I told him-it's only fun when you get to destroy things). This winter Barrett has agreed to go ice-skating with me if I try snow-skiing with him.:) Life is too short to not have a ball while we are here! I want to look back with no regrets, no wishes I'd tried something different. Whatever your goals are, I hope that you will do the same. 

For a place to get started, view my post on the Bucket List: http://cadaversandcoffee.blogspot.com/2012/08/deciding-what-mattersand-bucket-list.html