Confessions of a Former School-Teacher, Part 4

Rule #4: Humble Yourself

I am just slightly (cough, cough) perfectionistic. Maybe it is because I'm an only child, maybe because I have always been the annoying overachiever, maybe just because if I think something is going to be done it should be done right (which usually translates to me doing it!). Enter my first ever teaching experience. It was when I was working on my Bachelor's degree and interning once a week at Riverview Elementary. My mentor teacher told me I could prepare and teach a lesson to the fourth graders. I planned for hours. I found the perfect lesson plan that was on averaging numbers and even tied it  to Thanksgiving, which was coming up. On the day of the lesson I got up to instruct and interact with my temporary class. The kids were not getting it, at all.  I was floundering, and a few minutes into the lesson I said to the fourth graders, "this isn't working is it?" I scrapped the lesson right there and improvised, still teaching them how to average a set of numbers, but without the perfectly planned lesson. When it came to the end of the day, I was ready to hear what went wrong, and how my lesson completely flopped. My mentor teacher came up to me, grinning, and said, "Great job." I was confused. Nothing went as planned. "Your lesson flopped, " she said, "but you were able to admit it to the students and try something else-and that's huge." 

That was one of the most important lessons I learned about teaching and life. I had many perfectly planned lessons and activities flop over the years, and other great ones that came about completely unexpectedly. It's ok to admit when you are wrong. It's ok to apologize (even to people you're in charge of), and it's ok to take a detour. Sometimes what actually happens is better than the perfect plan.

Rule #5: Build Confidence
The last two years that I taught junior high and high school, it was not uncommon to find an entire gaggle of young boys around me, clamoring for my attention. They wanted to tell me about soccer games, get their driver's license, what cars they liked, and what books they'd read. My husband teased me mercilessly about it. "All those boys-they all have crushes on their teacher," he'd joke. I always told him, no, we just got along well. After-all, I have the sense of humor of a teenage boy, I like classic cars, drive a car now that is pretty "cool" as far as teen boys are concerned, read science fiction and love to discuss completely random facts, like the fact that in Texas it is illegal to spray paint someone else's cow (I LOVE random weirdness like that). Plus, I have two boys, so I relate to them.

In any student, boy or girl, heck-in any person, I like to find what makes them tick. What are their passions, skills and dreams? Maybe there is a shy girl in the back of the class. She gets poor grades, but she is a talented artist. I love finding out these things, and encouraging the person, and focusing on what they do well, and what they love. I think it is a huge confidence builder (especially in the teen years when a bad hair-day of a break-out can be reason enough to take cover). 

My husband finally confessed to me that he loved the fact that I always had a group of boys. He said he wished he'd had a teacher like me who had given him the time of day. He thought the fact that I playfully teased my boys as well as truly cared about their stories (and the fact that I'm young enough and possibly cute enough, lol) was just the nudge forward that teens need to have a good day and build their confidence. I don't know about that, but I do know that when you find what people truly love, encourage them! You may be the difference it makes in their day.