Happiness is NOT the Purpose of Life

There are many notions in this life. We are surrounded by quotes to believe in, cute e-cards to post on our Facebook walls, and sentiments for every occasion. One that I see often is that happiness is the meaning of life.

 I have to say that I fully reject this notion. This notion is BS, and by that I of course mean bologna sandwiches, which is what I have told my kids the few times I accidentally uttered that phrase. I believe that a life should be lived that is full of joy, yes. That is not why I reject this notion. I also believe that we are to find our happiness through our own selves and our beliefs, and through helping others. We should not rely on other people and things to make us happy. I know this is something that I struggle with as I am sure many of you do as well. 

Happiness though cannot be the meaning of life. The meaning of life is expected to be something grand and happiness is temporary. What do I mean by that? Just that joy in and of itself is fleeting like a butterfly lighting on your hand and then flying away. If you don't believe me on this, watch your child open a Christmas present and watch the way that their eyes light up with joy and happiness and excitement as soon as they open the present. Then fast-forward to five or 10 minutes later (or maybe two?).  The gift will no doubt get tossed aside as they move onto the next thing that they will find again temporary joy in. We are like that, always on the quest for the next thing, the new car, new job, new house, even new baby. I refuse to believe that the meaning of my existence is based on something so ever-changing. And if you want to get spiritual for a minute (because how can you ponder life without once thinking of where it came from), I refuse to think that the God I believe in is so limited, that happiness on Earth is all that life is about. Barrett and I had a deep conversation driving to dinner last night. One of the reasons I am so in love with my husband, is that we can talk about little stuff and we can talk about the BIG stuff as well. We talked about what he thinks life is about. He said he thinks we are here to learn, to learn to be the best people we truly can be. Now, contrary to what many religions believe, (and I am not trying to step on any feet here, just stating OUR opinions...), neither B nor I think that the meaning of life is to spread the word of God, at least not in the literal sense. We both believe that we are to share love and acceptance, wisdom and compassion with others, and by doing so to honor God. 

But back to the happiness cliche. If the goal of life was truly happiness, where does it start and end? And should I do anything to make myself happy? What if it is illegal? Or what if it hurts another person? Then is my happiness more important than the happiness of others? Because at some point you will cross this line if your search is only for things that make you happy.  Maybe sometimes happiness is found in making others happy. Deep thought. 

I know that today is a serious post, as these thoughts are some of the things I have been pondering, and I felt like sharing them. I like Barrett's idea that we are here to learn. I'd like to take it a few steps further and tell you what I believe is the purpose of our existence (or maybe I should say my own, so that you are free to choose what your purpose is). First though, a bit of history or diversity if you will for you. Confucius believed that the purpose of life was to live the best moral life a person could. In Buddhism the primary purpose of life is to end suffering. Christians have a few takes on this, but to sum up a few: obey God, lead others to God, become more like God. Still others (some Native American beliefs-they do not use the word religion, because they say it is limiting, as their beliefs ARE their way of life) believe that we are to take care of the planet and the creatures on it, that all living things have a spirit, and that we are to tread lightly while we are here on earth.  I have to say that I enjoy all of these purposes, and if you look at them closely, they are really not that different from one another. 

I think my view can be best summed up in a quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson:

What is YOUR purpose?