This Job is Deceptive Part 3

After a wonderful (and much needed) vacation in Hawaii, Barrett and I each returned to work this past Tuesday. I had heard over the vacation that I had indeed gotten the teaching position, so I did a bit (wink, wink) of shopping before heading back in. I had decided not to ask if I could paint (because I was pretty sure I would be told no), but had gotten rugs, wall hangings, lamps and other decorative items for the classroom. You can see before and after pictures here: Classroom Redone. I had felt a bit bad, because a gal that I work with had done what little decoration there was, and I took it all down. Basically it was just the motivational posters.  Since none of my students are really known for liking school (understatement of the week!), I wanted the classroom to look nothing like a classroom. I wanted it to feel more like a sitting room or living room. 

The kids are teaching me lots! Literally. The subject I am asked for help with the most is Algebra, so guess who is relearning that dandy of a subject? A couple more things I have been reminded of this week: 
-Never, ever lie to a student about something being better than it is. They will see right through you.
          The phrase, "Oh fun! You get to do 53 algebra problems in a row!" is probably not something they want to hear....ever. While I try to stay positive, I will let them complain about how not fun something is. Instead of trying to change their mind (or mine!), I just tell them "you have to do this, but I am here to help every step of the way." To me, and I hope to them, that seems a lot more real. We also take mini breaks often. 30 math problems? Okay have some hot chocolate. You turned in an essay? Do you want to color for ten minutes? Yes, we ALL like coloring. High school students included. I print cool, not young, coloring pages of dragons, and geometric (very detailed) designs...things that take days on end to color. It is something that gives their mind a quick time out. 

The 3 main things that I have been reminded of that matter when working with these kids?
1. Be consistent. They need stability. Small things can throw them for a loop. Try to be there at the same time every day (even if you have a kid that comes early and you don't quite have to be there just yet!)  Stand your ground on your expectations. If foul language is something you will not tolerate in a classroom at all (like me!), do not let it slide. Instead calmly, but firmly remind the students "That language is not welcome in my classroom."
2. Use humor. We need it. 3.5 hour chunks is a L-O-N-G time for these kids to be stuck working on school-work in the same room with the same peers. It is long for their teacher too. Humor goes a long way. Being able to laugh at yourself is very important too. 
3. Show acceptance. Do you remember being a teenager? It is an awkward stage at best. No matter how they look, and to a large extent, even how they behave and what choices they make, these kids need to know that you accept them as is. Do NOT go in trying to change them. Changes do happen, but they are in small increments after you have shown you are worthy of trust. Sometimes in my classroom this can be pretty extreme. Students may come in smelling like pot (which has to be reported), or un-showered, or dressed really strange quite frankly, and it is my job to smile and welcome them each and every day no matter what.

These kids that I am getting to know have problems so huge that I cannot fix them all. Their homes are broken, their parents uninterested, their clothes often dirty, they are often hungry. They may drink, smoke, do drugs and have sex all too soon and all too dangerously. Today I heard just a smidge of the life that one of my students is part of. I cried when they left. I prayed as well. Sometimes it feels too huge. I can't be the only one who cares. But then I think, hopefully I am not, and at least I do. 

I am reminded of Maslow's Hierrachy of Needs (fellow Psych lovers rejoice!), and how I cannot hope to help these kids without meeting their most basic of needs, and in some cases, that may be about all I can do. But I can do that. So, on my drive home today I brainstormed. I will find out their favorite breakfast/lunch foods and bring in those meals once a week as a special treat. I will have clean clothes from the thrift store (just simple things like hoodies) that they can take, no questions asked. I will have a bin in the bathroom with deodorant, body wash, toothpaste and toothbrushes that are free and can be taken in private. I even thought about implementing a back-pack type program used in elementary schools where 1 student each week is given a bag full of nutritious, easy-to-make meals and snacks for the weekend. Yes...it IS that bad.  I will develop a system where I meet with each student once a week and get to know them better facilitated by a simple questionnaire that asks these 3 questions for discussion: 1) what was the best part of your week? 2) what was the worst part of your week? 3) What, specifically, would make life easier/better next week? I want to hang a bulletin board that has the students' goals and color images of the places they want to visit. I want to make this classroom theirs for the time they are in it, and make myself available to them.  If anything I have said triggers an idea that you have, please message me. I am open to any ways to help. 

That is all for now. This job is deceptive. That remains a good title to my series. I never thought it could mean so much in so little a time. I never thought helping a small handful of kids could change me.