Family Time is Time That Matters

This topic has been weighing on my mind-how can families actually have fun together? Is the fun something that needs to be scheduled? Is it important for children? How do parents in today's busy world find the quality and quantity time needed to connect with their children?

My schedule right now is sort of weird and borne of necessity. I am in school just twice a week, but school is in Eugene and my available (and awesome) help is in Lebanon. So in a typical week I am home Monday with just Isaiah, and on Monday afternoon I take him to my parents. Isaiah stays with my dad while my mom is at work and I am at school. He is there Tuesday-Thursday afternoon. On Wednesday I have no class, and no children home during the day but in order to be more efficient with gas (read: money), Isaiah stays in Lebanon. Wednesdays I get homework done, errands, housework, and usually get to spend some extra time with Barrett as Wednesdays he works at home. Back to school all day Thursdays and then finally, both boys are home with me on Friday (Matt has school 4 days a week). This means in a typical week that is not shared with my ex-husband (as two weekends a month are), Matthew is home all 7 nights (unless invited to spend one weekend night with Nan and Pop), and Isaiah is here 4 nights. It is kind of crazy, but we get used to the changes in schedule, and the boys are very used to having 3 "homes" that they go between.  I say all that to let you, my readers, know that life can be done even when it is crazy. I spend 3+ hours each week just driving the children where they need to go (and it was even more during soccer season!).

While Barrett and I do pretty great at some parenting tasks, others I feel we could definitely improve upon . 
What things do you do well as a parent in regards to time spent with your children? And what could you change?

The Good

• Dinner is eaten together as a family every night, usually around the exact same time.
• Breakfast together in the morning before work and school.
• Each son has allocated chores that they do on a 1-2 times per week basis and get a (small) allowance for.
• A blessing is said before every meal. 
• Time spent with Matt (and Zay too when he is here) each weeknight equals about 2-4 hours, but is often just 30-60 minutes of "quality" time, while the rest is spent with "stuff".
• Matthew's homework is done every night (reading to us).
• Days that I am home with one or both boys I often have a recipe that we make, a craft (If I am really on it), some school time with math and/or reading activities, snuggle time, I read to them, and some outside time at the park or errands with mom.
• Finally, the boys are getting old enough to do some more interesting things, so sometimes we play the Wii together.

The Bad

• Often "together time" is met by lounging on the couch and watching a movie (and sometimes I read or play on my laptop)
• Sometimes Barrett or I (or both!) are too tired to put much effort into quality time.
• Sometimes I feel like I don't know how to entertain the kids and don't want to have to.
• Sometimes I am irritable, feeling quiet, and just want children in bed. 
• Often I have to fake interest in my son's homework (have you ever read (or listened to) the beginning reader books? I keep telling him reading only gets better!)

While the good outweigh the bad, I feel that we could do better. I would guess that you too are in the same boat. First of all, does this time with our children really matter? Click on the links provided below. A few are from Europe, but they definitely apply, as you can see that we Americans do the exact same things.

What Our Children Need is Time  While this is an article about the UK, notice where the USA ranks on the child well-being list!

The Importance of Family Dinner Eating as a family can lead to better school performance, healthier attitudes about food, less stress, and decreased risk of teenage drug use.

Parent's Spoil Children, but Often Just Co-Exist Under the Same Roof An article about how fancy toys and expensive gadgets are not really what children want from us.

So, hopefully we are in agreement that children indeed do need as much quality time as you can give them (which will vary day-to-day). That being said, what are some fun things you can do with your kids? B and I often have trouble with this as a lot of the kids' ideas of fun do not sound all that appealing to us, or the ones that do are expensive. 

Anytime Can be Quality Time

Great Free and Inexpensive Family Fun

Hopefully this gives you some ideas too! Happy Parenting!