I used to love New Year's resolutions too. There's something about that fresh new start that is synonymous with making a bunch of goals for the upcoming year. I don't think that is a bad thing at all. I am constantly setting goals, and re-evaluating my life. It is just something I enjoy doing. I used to love resolutions but it became more of a wish list, and often one that I honestly could not or would not achieve. Things like: lose 30 pounds, write a book, and travel the world would be things I'd aspire to. Umm, let's be slightly more realistic. One of the most useful things I've learned in nursing school pertains to goal setting, and that goals must be SMART (it's an acronym-nurses LOVE acronyms) for specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and timely. For example, "eat healthy" is not a smart goal, but eat 5 servings of fruits and vegetables each day is. I digress, slightly. The point is, I don't really care about losing 30 pounds, but would love to lose 5-10, eat more fruits and vegetables, and tone up, I am not sure I will ever have the attention span to write a book (I'd have to stick with the same topic for more than 2 sentences!). Blogging is much more realistic for me. I can't afford to nor do I have time to travel the world this year, but I can visit another state or two or maybe even leave the country again (I did pretty good on this last year with my Italy trip!).Last New Year's I wrote 4 words on a whiteboard on my fridge-my resolution: "Laugh more, stress less." I think, that for the most part, I achieved it. Looking back, it was not a super specific goal, but it was a good one for me. In the past I have let my own perfect expectations of how something should go ruin it when it didn't go exactly that way. I have stressed so much over things not going as planned. Rude awakening, right? It only took me 33 or so years to learn that THINGS NEVER GO EXACTLY AS PLANNED, and that's okay. That's great even. Barrett wasn't a plan for me, nursing wasn't a plan (not a firm one for many many years), sending the kids back to East Linn was not in the plans, and that aforementioned Italy trip was not planned until less than a week before going! The point is, plans change, things happen that are unplanned, and that we have to be flexible enough to just go with it and adjust as needed. It's okay, perfectly acceptable even, to not have all the answers and to say so. With the end of school in sight I am getting asked more and more "What kind of a nurse will you be?" I have NO idea. I know what I have enjoyed, I have analyzed it to death, but things change. Experiences change us. So, we'll see. I do have a good, honest answer to the question now though, "I'll be a good one."
I have spent a good point of my life planning for the future. Days and hours spent planning, but missed on living. I am not saying a plan is a bad thing-it is a good jumping off point, but I myself have lived too often looking ahead, missing what is going on RIGHT NOW. Phrases like "when it is summer", "when I graduate", "when we have the money" are uttered all too frequently. Obviously some things have to wait for the proper timing, but why not enjoy life as it happens? In 2016 many big changes will happen for me. It is the course of the timing. It is the proper time. I will graduate nursing school. I will start my new career. I think, maybe, I will apply to graduate school (on this, we'll see). These changes will impact my life and my family. My resolution this year though comes from a necklace my mom got me-"find joy in the journey" it says. The time will pass. New things will come to be, but in 2016 I vow to take each day at a time and notice and enjoy what is around me. Someday those things will be in the past. The sleepless nights with babies in my home? They are gone and now are missed. The short years I spent teaching? Gone and missed. The blood, sweat and tears with friends in nursing school? Soon, it will become a fond memory of a time in my life I had never been challenged so much.I encourage you too to find joy in the journey. Don't look so far ahead that you miss the gifts right before your eyes. Happy 2016.
