So what, you may ask, is nursing school really like?
I am past the first month in nursing school. I have passed my nursing midterm with an A, and I'm thrilled about that! I am now midway through week five which means I am over halfway through the entire first term of the program. It feels like just yesterday that I was questioning whether or not I should even do this… it feels like just yesterday that I locked the door of my classroom for the last time and told myself I wouldn't look back. It feels like just yesterday that I cried wondering if I had made the right decision.
I have to tell you that I have never been so happy (on a personal level, I mean I have been thrilled family wise, relationship wise....you get my drift), I have never felt so challenged mentally and physically to do things right, to get things done the correct way, and I've never felt so actively engaged in any academic material that I have ever learned in college. While I enjoyed getting my bachelor's and my master's degrees, I never found it difficult. I liked some of the classes quite a bit and the professors and my classmates, but I guess it never really felt like home- but I didn't realize that until now. But I will never regret my background in education. It has already helped me tremendously.
I walk into the nursing building and I feel at home. And I should-some days I am there so long it feels like I live there! It is part of me. I'm smiling on the way to school most days, though not all. I really truly enjoy my professors, and have such a camaraderie with my classmates that I never felt possible. People that I can talk to about the ins and outs of something that I am passionate about. It is a really good feeling! Though I still have far to go in this program, and in my nursing career of course, I can tell you that it feels real. There's no other way to describe it. With in just one week, I have cried because I am overwhelmed, I have jumped with joy over understanding a concept or getting something down, I have witnessed a patient in the process of dying and the sorrow of their family, and I've witnessed things too gross to really talk about with most normal people, though I thought they were amazingly cool! Nursing is real. The few days I have spent in the hospital left me with the same feeling I had in my CNA hospital rotation-you leave kind of in a daze, amazed that life for many other people has still been carrying on outside those hospital doors. Nursing school makes me feel real. It is such a good fit for me. I love nursing school, despite the huge stress, seemingly unrealistic expectations, time crunches, sadness and anxiety...or maybe, maybe because of all these things, knowing at the end of the day that not only can I do this, but I can make a difference to a patient.
Almost 4 weeks in! I cannot believe that I have been in nursing school for almost a month. I am starting to make wonderful new friends with some of the girls in the program, and it is so nice to have people that understand exactly what is going on in my life. I have only wondered once or twice, why in the heck am I putting myself through this?! There was one day where I wasn't feeling well, the lecture was boring, etc. etc. that I felt like I couldn't keep my head above water, and I thought why did I not just stick with teaching? But most days are not like that. Most days there is something that holds my interest. I loved learning about holistic care, and it was refreshing to know how open-minded nurses are expected to be about complementary and alternative medicine. I really enjoyed learning about education Ha ha ha! No surprise there, and how to talk to the patient about their health and wellness. I am hardly nervous at all anymore to do a blood pressure and to take vital signs.
Monday is our midterm for my first nursing class, and I am both nervous and excited. I know I am super weird, but I have always loved taking tests, and have normally done pretty well on tests. But I am nervous because I have no idea what to expect and I know they will hit us with some of the questions where there is more than one right answer and which is the most right of the correct answers. (Just to say that is confusing!)
It has been amazing to me just to see the change in the way that people talk to me knowing that I am a nursing student. My dental hygienist, the dental assistant, my OB/GYN, and her assistant, have all talked to me with a different level of respect, like I understand the medical field a little bit better. It is really nice. It's almost like I am now part of this big group that we call healthcare (I guess I am!), and it really feels like I belong here.
Next week we start learning about infant care, pregnancy, and women's health. Just today I started a binder with all of the things that I think I am interested in, and want to keep it up with my own notes and information about different programs for advanced practice nursing -just so that I can refer to that as I become interested in different things or cross them off my list. I can tell you that though I have no experience yet so far what has sparked my interest the most in talking about it and reading about it is women's health and or Pediatrics.
Well, off to go study for my microbiology test tonight and nursing mid-term Monday! Thanks for stopping by to read!
I am partway through my second week of nursing school. The main thing that I want to say, is that while it is busy, it is doable. I know that I am just beginning, and that things will get much busier and the material will get more difficult, but so far a big part of nursing school is being able to manage your time. Just because we just started does not mean that we are getting things easy. There is tons of reading to be done, activities to complete, labs to practice the skills for, and projects already assigned. For the most part, I have to say, I am loving it. The instructors are actually surprisingly kind, and told us that they have a lot invested in us. Did you know that one third of the total cost of a nurse's training is their tuition during nursing school? The other 2/3 is invested by the employer. I learned that a few days ago, and it goes to show that that's one of the reasons that the instructors and the school, as well as the hospitals around us want to see us succeed. After reading some horror stories about students all being super competitive and mean to each other, I am pleased to say that so far my class has been nothing but kind, friendly, and helpful to one another. Seems we are all in this together.
I am very blessed to not have to be working during the program. Some people are trying to work part time, and I cannot imagine working at all especially when I have two kids at home. Barrett is already picking up a lot of the slack by keeping the house clean, chauffeuring the kids around to their activities, and keeping dinners made. I have also started to tap into my frozen meals that I had prepared over the summer. Those are for nights that I am home before Barrett. I am such an all or nothing person that sometimes it is hard for me to know when to stop studying! There isn't a ton of material yet, but I know that we need to know it fairly well. I also need to be able to spend time with my family and my children. So far I have set up Friday nights and all day Saturday to be time with my kids and or time with Barrett. This has worked thus far but I've only had one weekend and I know that sometimes I will need to tap into that time for extra studying. I figure that everybody needs some personal time or fun time. It can't be all work, or we will get burned out before even being a nurse. I have started to get discouraged just once or twice so far, and then I remind myself of things that I've been through that have been much tougher. My first year of teaching I was a brand-new teacher with no experience, not even student teaching, because I was hired as an intern. During that time when I started I had a two-month-old baby and a two-year-old at home. My husband at the time was not very supportive of me being in school (that's the understatement of the year), and I was going to school full-time as well to work to attain my teaching license. This had me driving an hour one way to Salem two nights a week (after not sleeping through the night and then working all day at a new career) for three hour night classes as well as going in on Saturdays. I also had a class online. And I think to myself, that if I could do that, (and it must've been pure adrenaline getting me through), then I can do anything.
One thing that I've been really excited to learn about is opportunities in nursing. We have talked just a little bit about some of the different specialties with the instructors, or at least my group has. We've talked about going on further than our associates degrees and what there is to offer for people who go further. It is hard exactly to know what I want to do when we have yet to set foot in the hospital. That is coming up! In just two short weeks, and I start on the oncology floor. I'm very excited about that, because it's one of the areas that I want to rule out (or in!). One thing that keeps resonating with me is that the instructors talk a lot about intuition and knowing when to listen to your gut feeling. Part of that, is the ideas that you have about different areas of nursing often before you've even experienced them. Many areas are a love it or hate it thing. While sometimes you will indeed change your mind and decide that you love something you thought you would hate or vice versa, often people have a little voice that directs them to what they think they will like or to what they already love. I am trying to jot down the feelings that I get about different areas so that I can keep track of how I have felt about them. So far, I am not interested at all in intensive care nursing. There's something about the ICU that I do not want to work with. I think it's the fact that there are so many complex machines that are helping keep people alive. I am not interested in learning how to run them, although I'm sure I will get some overview of that. So it goes to show that I'm also not interested in any of the areas that are highly technical. Some of the areas that I think I will be interested in are: labor and delivery, possibly emergency department (it definitely goes with my need for variety personality), anything that involves lots of teaching like community health nursing or perhaps working for a community health organization like Red Cross, and possibly… There's this little voice right now that keeps whispering to me Pediatrics. And I smile and laugh because this is the girl who never wanted kids, and then had two and loves being a mom. The girl who never wanted kids and became a teacher, and loved interacting with all of the students. So some of you may be laughing and nodding and saying you're not surprised at all, but to me it comes as a surprise and I keep kind of pushing away the little voice, and then I remind myself that the little voice is often very important. So I'm excited to try out pediatrics when I can, and I don't really know where to go with that if I love it. Perhaps a pediatric nurse practitioner is an option. I have not completely ruled out being a nurse practitioner, but I keep leaning towards doing something that's more in education like eventually being a nursing instructor. Surprise, surprise.
I am so excited and blessed to have begun this journey. I think that the two years will fly by (although I am sure there will be days that feel like they aren't flying). I could not do this without the support from my wonderful husband, my parents, and our grandparents that are so willing to help us with the kids and anything else. I also couldn't do this without the understanding of my kids. So far they have been wonderful and understanding my need to study and very curious about what mom is learning at school. It's kind of funny. Because I keep having to tell them mom doesn't really know anything yet. But they are more than willing to listen and to let me practice on them. I love the health professions building. Did I mention that it has a coffee shop?? Yeah, I probably did. That's all for now.
